sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
You brought string cheese to the strip club
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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