He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
