Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize
