Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
