Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
