did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
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