in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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