Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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