I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
