Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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