Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
