He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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