They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize