am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Randomize