Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
