Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
