Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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