if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
We left an ass print on the piano.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
