Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
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