Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize