butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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