Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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