it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
she smelled like a LAN party
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
