she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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