so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
