So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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