I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hippo gnu deer
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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