My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
This beer is not sobering me up at all
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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