He is like the real live version of the state fair..
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I love having hate sex.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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