so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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