just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
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