So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
