They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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