how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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