Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
