i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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