3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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