he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Randomize
