Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
We are all done wearing pants today
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Randomize
