At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Randomize
