why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize