She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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