Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize
