i already hear my dad disowning me
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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