ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
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Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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