Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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