And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?