Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I got inside last night via doggy door
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there