Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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