So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
