I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
This is my gift to your gina
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
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