so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
