we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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