you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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