didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
