Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
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